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1. Hello Graham, My name is Ashley and I am the sister inlaw of a reenct c4 quad patient. My sister inlaw was in a horrific car accident in which she shattered her 4th and 5th vertbrae and damaged the 6th one as well. I was going over websites trying to find more information on her condition when I came across your site and thought oh my god she needs to read this!!! First and foremost I wanted to let you know what an inspiration you are to the disabled not many people with your type of injury have your attitude! I also wanted to ask you a few questions in regards to her recovery if I may She had her accident on Feb 26, 2010 and has been at the hospital here since that date. When she came in to the hospital the dr's informed us that she had shattered her 4th and 5th vertbrae and that they would need to conduct surgury, taking bone from her neck or hip to make new vertbraes and then connect them with 2 rods keeping her neck stable. The dr's told us she would have a 20% chance of making it through the 10 hour surgery and she did :) Then came the hard stuff We were told that because of where she sustained her injury they call her a c4 patient that she would have head movement, only shoulder movement if we were very lucky. she spent the first 4 weeks of her ordeal in SICU (surgical intensive care unit) on a boatload of drugs and a ventilator as she could not breath on her own.on March 21 she moved to IICU (intermediate intensive care unit) which specializes in removing the ventilator. She has reenctly come off the ventilator (YAY!!!) and she is now eating, drinking and of course talking!!! I hadn't heard her voice in 2 months and was soooo glad to have her playing tricks and being back to her old self . then came the realization. Once she was off the ventilator and able to talk she was more able to express her emotions. I can only imagine what her mind and body is going through right now and I want to do my best to help but am not really sure how. Our days are now spent being angry, then crying then being happy for a bit and repeating this cycle which I'm sure is normal. Before her accident she and I were not very close but afterwards we have both come to realize that life is too short, so she has been asking me to help out with some of her personal care I.E. brush her teeth, shave her legs, brush and stlye her hair and most reenctly make up. I love doing these things for her and will continue to do so if she wants me to but I fee like im not doing enough. Lately she has been very emotional which is to be expected but she has also said some very harsh things towards us which im certain she doesnt mean but it's still very hard to take in. While her boyfriend and I were getting her ready to see a visitor she had a major breakdown. She said she couldn't live like this, was giving up, didn't care about therapy and she just wanted to go home who can blame her right? then she told us that she didn't know who to blame for the state she was currently in the drunk driver who caused the accident, or us her family for keeping her alive when we should have let her die. Her boyfriend and I just didn't know what to say.We have been trying so hard to do everything and anything we can to help her with her recovery and now she was pushing us all away which from what I read above with your accident is a typical feeling. The last week or so has been much harder for her and she is slowly getting better as she has good moments but then slips back into the dark.There are 5 of us (mom, dad, brother, boyfriend and myself) who have been at her side everyday since the accident and are not going anywhere but how does one take the harsh words that come from her anger? I know in my heart that she will slowly come around but then I think what if she doesn't? To me everything she does is amazing!They said she would maybe move her shoulders as in give us the shoulder shrug once in a while and I am estatic to say that she has much more movement then that!! She started to regain feeling in her right bicep which moved to her elbow then to her wrist. she can now touch her chin with her right hand with a bit of assitance and is also regaining feeling in her left arm, stomach and bum. The last few days she has also moved her pinky and ring finger along with her thumb a few times!!! She could also feel me rubbing her toes as well. I guess im just looking for more things I can do for her to help her through recovery. She has an amazing boyfriend who is not going anywhere and takes extrememly good care of her but mentally she is not doing well. she tends to compare who she is now to who she was before the accident and does not seem to see the positivity in what she has already accomplished.How can we as a family help her through that? She will be moving to rehab next week to start full time OT and PT. she is quite excited to get to rehab but also more excited to go home. She wants to get out sooner than later and we want her to use the rehab experiance to the best of her abilities how can we make her see that rehab is where she really needs to be?She is also having huge difficulties with showering and moving from the bed to chair. To her she has lost her dignity and will never get it back is this a constant feeling you still have or does this go away over time? I think she is also worried about being intimate with her boyfriend as well but she would never talk about that sort of thing with us.She is going to be 29 in June and had just started thinking about having a family. She was able to feel a rectal exam the other day which makes me hopeful that she has or will have feeling in her lady parts, but is it possible for her to have a family and feel those things? I guess I'm just trying to make sense of everything so I can do my best to help her in any way I can. again I can only imagine what she is going through and I want to help her see that she is still the same person. Thank you for your time and again thank you for your website!
   #3259# kommentar 2012-03-20